Some say love...

In the Backstreet Boys' song, "PDA", they describe crazy, intense, passionate love where they can't keep their hands off of each other even in public, which is similar to many songs nowadays. In Justin Bieber's song, "As Long As You Love Me," he describes always being there for a girl, regardless of how much money they have, or where they are in the world. Everything will be alright as long as they love each other. Realistically, this is far-fetched and not very likely. People may love each other and still get a divorce because they have too many differences and past issues prevent them from being able to sustain their relationship. In her song "Our Song", Taylor Swift describes a casual, comfortable relationship that is common among teens. This love described is more realistic, and less passionate and erotic. In the song, "Be Your Everything," Boys Like Girls describe a life where the boy will be everything to the girl, "shelter, storm, forever and a fling." In order to have a true, lasting relationship, a couple needs to have more than one person as their all, because that can lead to immense disappointment and depression. In her song, "One and Only" Adele asks a boy to let her be his "one and only," "to give her the chance to walk the mile with him." To be someone's "one and only" is a lot of pressure and severely limiting. In my own idea of a relationship, I hope to find someone who can be my best friend, who can not only connect with me, but also hold a special place in the world that is my friends and family. I have always cherished the idea of having a soul mate, but not in the same erotic, passionate way. I believe there is someone out there for me, but he fits into every aspect of my world, including my romantic life. I hope to be able to exist as an individual outside of the relationship. I agree with the article in that I don't expect to depend on one person to give me eternal happiness, rather, I hope that he acts as one of many means that grant me fulfillment and content.

Changing Face of Marriage

This description of the "Domestic Church" is very similar to what my parents preach at home, with some exceptions. There is an overall feeling of love and forgiveness; however, we are not always perfect. My parents make mistakes as do my siblings and myself. Changing the structure and function of a family can have both positive and negative side effects. On the positive side, it can bring a family closer to its faith and learn to merge what is preached to the actions they perform. However, this could also have negative consequences. Changing the structure of a family could also change a husband or wife's perspective, and thus possibly lead to conflict or in extreme circumstances, divorce. The fact that those people with a college degree are less likely to experience divorce or multiple marriages is not very surprising to me. If one takes the time to develop one's mind intellectually, one can further come to know one's true desires and can translate that into choosing a life partner. I hope to incorporate my own take on the "domestic church" in my own home and make it a place of love, forgiveness, and trust.

Marriage and Vatican II

In Vatican II, the constitution says that marriage is to be highly esteemed and preaches the "lofty calling" of spouses and parents. Although marriage is still considered a huge step in one's life, it does not exist on the same pedestal that the Church believes it should be. Because of the ease with which one can get a divorce and then remarry, marriage does not exist as a binding, eternal commitment. Vatican II council also states that marriage is a vocation. Most people today don't view it that way. Marriage, for some, is restrictive and binding. One's marriage is not placed at the forefront of one's life today. The constitution also stated that "conjugal love is not a fleeting event, but the patient project of a lifetime." Today, we exist in a world of instant gratification. The idea of spending one's entire life growing to understand and truly love someone is not a task that most wish to complete. The divorce rate is very high, allowing couples to forego this idea of a lifetime commitment. The constitution also states that the love between two spouses should grow and develop over time. Rather than being patient with one another and allowing their relationship to mature, some couples take the easy way out with divorce. Most couples do allow their love to grow, but not as much as they did in the past.

Dating: What's the Point?

I think that a lot of the "extracurricular" dating that occurs today is practice for marriage. If people become used to only experiencing one person and getting to the know them for a short period of time before dumping  him or her, he or she might carry that same mentality over to marriage. However, I do not agree that we should avoid dating completely, but merely choose our dates wisely to develop a particular preference in a partner. As Freitas and King stated, dating allows a person to grow and experience multiple different people in order to fully gain an understanding of oneself and what one hopes to find in a significant other. I think that a lot of my peers date merely to say that they are dating someone. The social status that comes with the title of being "coupled" is irresistible for some. I even have close friends that remain with boyfriends because of their own insecurities. If people were more particular with their relationships, society today would probably not have as many "hook-ups" in today's world. Although most people have their own understanding of what a hook-up is, according to the graphs displayed in the article, most people want to have an emotional response or possibly a relationship, but believe that the chances of an actual relationship forming are very slim. In most cases, women are left waiting for a phone call or text that isn't coming. Also, according to the article, most college students are "hooking-up" as often as everyone thinks they are. The stating of one's "hook-ups" is merely a tool for social acceptance rather than a bragging of one's true actions.